Every day — usually many times a day — I hear those four precious little words from our 3-year-old, Tobias. “Play with me, Mommy!” He loves, and often demands, the full attention of those around him.
This summer, the tables were turned.
In July, Cru Inner City gathered its staff from across the nation in Black Mountain, North Carolina for a Soul Care Retreat. Our national leadership intentionally designed the time to be a respite from the demands of ministry and a time of deep connection with one another and the Lord. Wade and I were incredibly thankful for the time. We are still discussing things we learned about prioritizing healthy rhythms of rest as we minister long-term in the city.
We both were impacted by a seminar on “Silent Prayer,” which is the spiritual practice of focusing on God’s presence through silence. Instead of always approaching prayer as a time to spew all our requests at God it is the exercise of quieting oneself in His presence, dwelling on His character.
Wade was shocked by how many unrelated thoughts could flow through his head in three minutes of dead silence. For me, I kept circling back to that image of Tobias, tugging at my leg, saying, “Play with me, Mommy.”
“As I sat in the silence I kept circling back to that image of Tobias tugging at my leg, saying, “Play with me, Mommy.”
I let my mind stay there and the Holy Spirit began to reveal to me that the Lord is offering me the same invitation to connect with Him. “Come play with Me … come be with Me … delight in Me … rest in Me.”
Tears fell as I realized my response to the Lord’s gracious pursuit of me is often similar to the way I respond to Tobias’ requests for playtime.
“Let me finish this one last thing.”
“I’ll be right there, right after this.”
“OK, sorry, one more thing.”
I sat with the Lord in that moment of conviction, confessing, “I’m here now, Lord. I’m sorry it took me so long.”
His response was clear, “There’s grace here little one. Let’s go play.”
I’m continually learning what it means to delight in a life of intimacy with God and not just living “on mission” for Him. I’m so thankful for how He invites us to walk with Him.
One of our team leaders is regularly heard saying, “Your ministry is an overflow of your own walk with God.” Embracing the Lord’s call to commune with Him strengthens and equips us to respond to His summons to serve. Things get really out of whack when we respond to His invitation to serve but not to His invitation to connect. Our secure relationship with Him allows ministry to pour out of us.
Things get really out of whack when we respond to His invitation to serve but not to His invitation to connect.”
Since the retreat, we’ve been regularly practicing silent prayer as a family. Wade wisely knew there was no way our boys could be silent for three straight minutes, so we started with five seconds and worked our way up to 12 seconds. It’s amazing how quiet and engaged they are as they dwell on God’s presence with them amid everyday life. Nehemiah shared he often imagines God drawing with him. Micah thought about watching the ocean waves together and Tobias played action figures with God.
Oh, that we would be people that know this truth of Immanuel — God with us — deep in our innermost being. I pray that you will lean into the ways the Lord is inviting you to connect with Him and serve Him in this season.
